I celebrate Easter because I realize that I have a family in Christ, that I have a Father who loves me and cares for me unconditionally. I can do no more to earn His love than Lazarus did to raise himself from the dead. I am dead outside of His love for me. Without His love and acceptance of me, I would be dead.
If I had to survive on the acceptance and forgiveness of certain others, I would die of starvation.
Thankfully I do not. I have a family that has seen me at my worst and loves me anyway. I strive to be better for them not for anyone else.
Love begets Love, and as Scripture says, If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn't love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. -1 Corinthians 13:1
By the way...what is it about human nature that the ones we feel the most rejection and disapproval from we seek to appease? Why do we seek love from those who act the most unloving towards us? As if they are capable of being fair? As the saying goes...you may be the ripest, juiciest peach in the market, but there will always be people out there who don't like peaches. How can you even believe you can teach them to feel otherwise. It is not your job to change human nature. You don't need to strive for their acceptance.
I can accept that judgment and understand my role in rejection. And the sour taste it left. But that is all I can do. The rest is on their watch.
James 3:2-10 For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.
But I can also trust in that God sees my heart now. He sees my intention. And while some might not be ready to accept that, God already did.
That is where the apologies and emails and letters flow from. I know I have to ask for forgiveness to be accepted into His family. His family. And while I had assumed that meant others as well, I am willing to wait and pray until that day arrives. I can do no more to change their opinions of me than raise myself from the dead.
That is the reality of Easter for me. I may never meet the standard that they set for me to be acceptable to Him. You can believe I am unforgivable. Jesus Christ did not. And he forgave me SO much that He gave His life up for me. Within Him all things are made new, and the dead are brought to life.
I was nothing but dust. And I believe in one day to see Him beyond the veil face to face, and knowing He saw my struggle, and loved me and welcomed me into His family for eternity.
and it was a beautiful thing.
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