I absolutely adore my husband. He said to me at dinner Thursday "I think we are going to have to get a new lawnmower." He said "The lawnmower was on its last legs LAST summer. It was literally putting out huge black puffs of smoke." I always see my husband putting himself in obviously non-environmentally-friendly situations. He can do that. Because he makes his living saving the planet. It's like the cardiologist who smokes. So we were planning on getting a new lawnmower in May. Then yesterday he decided he was going to take it apart -one last look in the casket. Just to see what was going on. (This is the same man who put 4-wheel drive transmission in the International Scout my parents gave us as a wedding gift... The same car that we had to pour Sprite into to get us home from our honeymoon. He resurrected that car from the dead. So yes he has mad car repair skills. Meaning It stopped needing Sprite to run.) He takes the lawnmower apart. I have no idea what he is doing. He comes in later yesterday afternoon, elated. It was only the air filter that needed cleaning. He cleaned a thick layer of detritus from the filter and then soaked all the parts in gasoline to fully clean them. He says last night 'Hey Kim! I want to show you something! Come here!' I walk over to the garage where he is holding up a blue bucket. Inside the blue bucket is all of the mower parts soaking in gasoline."Smell that" he says "that is what my childhood smelled like. Machine parts soaking in gasoline". He is grinning from ear to ear. This morning he goes back out to the garage. Wearing his Broncos knit cap, cut off shorts and a t-shirt so old it's changed into a gray color. I heard the lawnmower roar to life. He comes back in. "Fixed it" he says. "It was only the air filter. But now I can't find the bolt that screws the air filter back into place. So I've got two rubber bands attaching it to the frame." He brings me so much joy. Happy Sunday.
We get it.
We understand.
You're a Senator from Illinois with absolutely no foreign policy experience.
But Mr. President...realize when you are in over your head.
Be teachable.
Don't mock your elders. Take wisdom from those who have had more expertise and better information than yourself.
The Cold War might be over, Obama.
But that doesn't mean Russia won't invade Poland.
And that doesn't mean that on April 23, 2014- five weeks after Russia incredibly and almost mockingly invaded Ukraine-you aren't sending American paratroopers into Poland.
It's not that we disapprove of your show of force in Europe. Oh no. No, we would never ever ever criticize your ability to finally admit some value to stabilizing Eastern Europe.
No it's your youthful arrogance and bold-faced claims of knowing better when everyone else was patently disagreeing with your foreign policy narrative.
Here's what I am going to propose.
I am going to try and reach you at another level of cogniscance. Another different method of teaching. We're going to try and educate you in foreign policy using targeted learning methods specifically focused on gaining your attention.
That's right we're going to use sports analogies.
Fitting.
Since Russia was invading Ukraine on March 19, 2014
you went on ESPN and filled out your March Madness NCAA Men's Basketball bracket.
Because acknowledging changes in world dynamics or politics is beneath you. No, better to take a blase approach and act unconcerned. Like go on national news outlets and fill out college basketball brackets.
We get it. We appreciate your passion for sports.
Actually thank you for sending us a message on how best to get your attention.
Focus on the ball. Keep your eye on the ball.
Here's our suggestion...Better to heed the advice of those elders above. Those who have had more success with team-building and team success and winning championships. Those who take pride in the teams they've
been given.
Politics can be seen somewhat like athletic competition. You want that bill to pass. You want your majority to win the race...
PACs...Boosters...what's the difference.
Yes politics and sports do share commonalities. But unlike sports, politicians seem to be uncapable of respecting or listening to those pundits who have had more success and are more experienced and well-informed. It's a pride thing for this administration.
But be humble, sir. Listen to those who have gone on before.
Listen to people like Red Auerbach, who won nine NBA Basketball Championships. (Nine!)
"How do we discern the difference between the enemy's condemnation and God's conviction?
One afternoon, I’d had it with my son’s attitude, and I let him know it. Then I felt horrible for losing my temper. Feelings of guilt overwhelmed me. And, I {almost} convinced myself that's how God wanted me to feel. But then I remembered a pastor describing the difference between conviction and condemnation.
He said condemnation sweeps over us with accusing thoughts like: you’re such a failure, you’re a horrible person. It brings guilt and shame.
God’s conviction is specific, instructional and leads to restoration. He’ll show us a behavior that was wrong and give us ideas of how to make it right like nudging us to apologize and ask for forgiveness.
That day, I let God’s conviction lead me and bring restoration between my son and me by apologizing. God's grace replaced my guilt and chased all that condemnation away.” - @Renee Swope
I celebrate Easter because I realize that I have a family in Christ, that I have a Father who loves me and cares for me unconditionally. I can do no more to earn His love than Lazarus did to raise himself from the dead. I am dead outside of His love for me. Without His love and acceptance of me, I would be dead.
If I had to survive on the acceptance and forgiveness of certain others, I would die of starvation.
Thankfully I do not. I have a family that has seen me at my worst and loves me anyway. I strive to be better for them not for anyone else.
Love begets Love, and as Scripture says, If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn't love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. -1 Corinthians 13:1
By the way...what is it about human nature that the ones we feel the most rejection and disapproval from we seek to appease? Why do we seek love from those who act the most unloving towards us? As if they are capable of being fair? As the saying goes...you may be the ripest, juiciest peach in the market, but there will always be people out there who don't like peaches. How can you even believe you can teach them to feel otherwise. It is not your job to change human nature. You don't need to strive for their acceptance.
I can accept that judgment and understand my role in rejection. And the sour taste it left. But that is all I can do. The rest is on their watch.
James 3:2-10 For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.
But I can also trust in that God sees my heart now. He sees my intention. And while some might not be ready to accept that, God already did.
That is where the apologies and emails and letters flow from. I know I have to ask for forgiveness to be accepted into His family. His family. And while I had assumed that meant others as well, I am willing to wait and pray until that day arrives. I can do no more to change their opinions of me than raise myself from the dead.
That is the reality of Easter for me. I may never meet the standard that they set for me to be acceptable to Him. You can believe I am unforgivable. Jesus Christ did not. And he forgave me SO much that He gave His life up for me. Within Him all things are made new, and the dead are brought to life.
I was nothing but dust. And I believe in one day to see Him beyond the veil face to face, and knowing He saw my struggle, and loved me and welcomed me into His family for eternity.
Any wife can attest to the challenge we face in dressing our men. Men typically don't follow the latest fashion trends or make time out of their busy schedules to go on netaporter.com or stylista. These are not priorities in most heterosexual males' daily calendars.
Beloved is no exception.
Here is where I post pictures of him wearing cut-offs and white socks and Nike sneakers.
Here is where I post pictures of him wearing his "I've got a Brown Belt in Crazy" t-shirt.
Or his Big Wheel "Old School" t-shirt.
Of course my favorite is him in his Speed Racer t-shirt because dammit it's just plain sexah.
No, Beloved's clothing cortege consists of the following....cotton button-down plaid shirts. Both short-sleeve for summer and long-sleeve for winter. These shirts will be worn to oblivion....wearing to white at the cuffs and hems with a threat of the collar splitting in two at the fold. He does not like to shop. And his shoes are no different. Pull-on loafers from Land's End or Eddie Bauer. Rotated in occasionally with steel-toe workboots for refinery visits or oil rig stops.
One recent development in his clothing attire retinue is the introduction of Old Navy Slimfit slacks. I had purchased those- at high risk of rejection- for Christmas this year. I felt this was an upgrade from the regular pleated-front, tab back-pocket Dockers that were hung precisely in his closet.
(have I mentioned my husband's profession?
He is an engineer.
His closet-well HIS side of the closet- is in stark contrast to mine.
I am not an engineer. Okay maybe a DOMESTIC engineer---but my side of the closet looks like a rainbow vomited in it. Lots of inventory crammed into the space. His chosen profession has its qualities and characteristics that I find appealing. Like precision. Exactitude. It has his slacks hung neatly on hangers, with each hanger spaced precisely 3 cms apart. I don't know how he accomplishes that, but he maintains a near mathematical-order to his side of the closet. )
Beloved's expression upon opening the flat navy blue box Christmas morn was one of confusion. Distrust. He did not ask for the Slimfit style. He asked for Classic style. Old Navy. In colors of navy or khaki.
He tried on the Slimfits. It went something akin to this....
It was needless to say, not unlike putting socks on a dog. Lots of funny locomotion.
But eventually as the months passed the Slimfits made more and more appearances on his body's rather attractive lower portion of his body.
And on the Seventh Day God rested.
But the discussion continued...I could tell that change is a continuing challenge for the Good Dr. While a brilliant and creative genius at all things mechanical, his confidence in personal appearance continued to daunt his daily existence. Every time the Slimfits made an appearance he would announce it as if he needed the reassurance that Yes, the Slimfits were still appropriate choice and that No, he did not look as if he was wearing yoga pants or jeggings.
Last night he came home late from a day of graduate and faculty gathering at a local new hotspot. He says "I can't remember what they call it...Happy Hour?" He came home around 8pm and when I announced I was in the mood to watch one of our movies, he agreed.
We decided to watch 'Skyfall' which is one of our favorite movies.
Daniel Craig, Javier Bardem, Ralph Fiennes...all ultimate fierce paragons of masculinity in the film.
Whether it is Craig's dapper use of the tuxedo (lingerie for women)
Ralph Fiennes sharp British sense of style
or Javier Bardem's unique usage of geometric prints and hair dye
the film, as Bond films usually are, was a panoply of male fashion highlights.
But all failed to register comment until the climax of the film, when Bardem and his chopperful of hoodlums debark into the cold Scottish evening to ambush Bond's childhood home.
Beloved piped up...
"Hey! All those guys are wearing Slimfits!"
His insecurities about Slimfits were soothed.
If it's good enough for Scottish Black Ops... it's good enough for him.
So annoying...my apologies but for whatever reason my blog isn't showing up my pictures! If you are reading it and are seeing a gray minus sign icon, I am so sorry, but there USED to be a very pertinent and brilliant picture there to share!
I have had 11 reads from the Ukraine this week. It had been silent for so long. So a smile did cross my lips as I read that my friends from the Ukraine and the Crimean Peninsula have resurfaced.
Seriously...Bill Gothard was 'rightupthere' alongside Jesus Christ and the Apostle Paul on Scripture and Biblical teaching.
My dad followed his books on parenting and on resolving conflicts among teenagers to the letter. He was 'divinely inspired'. A 'man of God'. A 'true disciple of Christ'. A man 'to be modeled after'. We read his book "Character Sketches" for a time there every evening before dinner.
This was before we all started wolfing down our food so we could be excused faster.
Bill Gothard never married. Bill Gothard never had any children of his own.
Apparently he was too busy raising everyone else's. And by 'raising' we mean grooming into victims. Cannot be more shocked.
