Going All Rapunzel

Literally one of the best articles on raising strong women  I have ever read....in book form or on the Interwebs. Good, good good.

Parenting 101

Natural consequences are far worse than anything we could do as parents. It is not about being disobedient or not listening to us. It's about not caring about yourself enough to pay attention. As parents our hearts hurt just as much when mistakes are realized.
But not only because of disobedience. But out of the nature of natural consequences.
They are scary and bring things to light like maturity, reality and truth.
And as the saying goes...the truth hurts.

It stops being about us and our feelings long before we are ready to stop taking it personally. It's not about us. Maybe it never was. For many it will never be about making their parents happy. They have to find that compass from within.

The trick for parenting is this: to be available to them when natural consequences occur. Not only to see the reality pass over their countenance-and realize your own sympathy and feel compassion-but to teach your children that you are there. And you don't hate them. Yes you can be disappointed and feel angry and frustrated but remember----this stopped being about you a long, long time ago.

Natural consequences should never be taken personally.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to my Dad.
Here is the last time we had dinner together, November 2009. It captures who he is.

Intense.
Passionate.
Opinionated.
Brilliant.
Yet as one woman who knows and has worked with him said he is at times  "A prophet who lacks mercy".

I'm sorry we have not seemed to resolve our problems. I love you and miss you.

Fixed It.

I absolutely adore my husband. 
He said to me at dinner Thursday "I think we are going to have to get a new lawnmower."
He said "The lawnmower was on its last legs LAST summer. It was literally putting out huge black puffs of smoke." 
I always see my husband putting himself in obviously non-environmentally-friendly situations. He can do that. Because he makes his living saving the planet. It's like the cardiologist who smokes.
So we were planning on getting a new lawnmower in May.
Then yesterday he decided he was going to take it apart -one last look in the casket. Just to see what was going on.
(This is the same man who put 4-wheel drive transmission in the International Scout my parents gave us as a wedding gift... The same car that we had to pour Sprite into to get us home from our honeymoon. He resurrected that car from the dead. So yes he has mad car repair skills. Meaning It stopped needing Sprite to run.)
He takes the lawnmower apart. I have no idea what he is doing.
He comes in later yesterday afternoon, elated. It was only the air filter that needed cleaning. He cleaned a thick layer of detritus from the filter and then soaked all the parts in gasoline to fully clean them.
He says last night 'Hey Kim! I want to show you something! Come here!' I walk over to the garage where he is holding up a blue bucket. Inside the blue bucket is all of the mower parts soaking in gasoline."Smell that" he says "that is what my childhood smelled like. Machine parts soaking in gasoline". He is grinning from ear to ear.
This morning he goes back out to the garage. Wearing his Broncos knit cap, cut off shorts and a t-shirt so old it's changed into a gray color. I heard the lawnmower roar to life. He comes back in.
"Fixed it" he says. "It was only the air filter. But now I can't find the bolt that screws the air filter back into place. So I've got two rubber bands attaching it to the frame."
He brings me so much joy. Happy Sunday. 

Praemonitus praemunitus

We get it.
We understand.
You're a Senator from Illinois with absolutely no foreign policy experience.
But Mr. President...realize when you are in over your head.
Be teachable.
Don't mock your elders.  Take wisdom from those who have had more expertise and better information than yourself.
The Cold War might be over, Obama.
But that doesn't mean Russia won't invade Poland.
And that doesn't mean that on April 23, 2014- five weeks after Russia incredibly and almost mockingly invaded Ukraine-you aren't sending American paratroopers into Poland.

"The 1980s called and want their Cold War back"

It's not that we disapprove of your show of force in Europe. Oh no. No, we would never ever ever criticize your ability to finally admit some value to stabilizing Eastern Europe. 

No it's your youthful arrogance and bold-faced claims of knowing better when everyone else was patently disagreeing with your foreign policy narrative. 

Here's what I am going to propose. 

I am going to try and reach you at another level of cogniscance. Another different method of teaching. We're going to try and educate you in foreign policy using targeted learning methods specifically focused on gaining your attention. 

That's right we're going to use sports analogies. 

Fitting. 

Since Russia was invading Ukraine on March 19, 2014

 you went on ESPN and filled out your March Madness NCAA Men's Basketball bracket. 

Because acknowledging changes in world dynamics or politics is beneath you. No, better to take a blase approach and act unconcerned. Like go on national news outlets and fill out college basketball brackets. 

We get it. We appreciate your passion for sports. 

Actually thank you for sending us a message on how best to get your  attention. 

Focus on the ball. Keep your eye on the ball. 

Here's our suggestion...Better to heed the advice of those elders above. Those who have had more success with team-building and team success and winning championships. Those who take pride in the teams they've 

been given. 

Politics can be seen somewhat like athletic competition. You want that bill to pass. You want your majority to win the race...

PACs...Boosters...what's the difference.

Yes politics and sports do share commonalities. But unlike sports, politicians seem to be uncapable of respecting or listening to those pundits who have had more success and are more experienced and well-informed. It's a pride thing for this administration. 

But be humble, sir. Listen to those who have gone on before. 

Listen to people like Red Auerbach, who won nine NBA Basketball Championships. (Nine!) 

'Praemonitus praemunitus'

  Forewarned is Forearmed. 

The game is 21. What is your score. 

The BLM worries about Cattle

But in the case of the Bundys...I think they worry too much.
Warning: graphic images.

Celebrating Earth Day with the BLM

Condemnation vs Conviction

"How do we discern the difference between the enemy's condemnation and God's conviction? 

One afternoon, I’d had it with my son’s attitude, and I let him know it. Then I felt horrible for losing my temper. Feelings of guilt overwhelmed me. And, I {almost} convinced myself that's how God wanted me to feel. But then I remembered a pastor describing the difference between conviction and condemnation.

He said condemnation sweeps over us with accusing thoughts like: you’re such a failure, you’re a horrible person. It brings guilt and shame.

God’s conviction is specific, instructional and leads to restoration. He’ll show us a behavior that was wrong and give us ideas of how to make it right like nudging us to apologize and ask for forgiveness.

That day, I let God’s conviction lead me and bring restoration between my son and me by apologizing. God's grace replaced my guilt and chased all that condemnation away.” - @Renee Swope